I forgot to tell you...

One of the other things that gives me anxiety is children.

Which is one of the reasons I'm hesitant about becoming an aunt. I'm going to be an aunt. Jason and Melissa are popping one out.

But I think it is interesting that my brother's myspace page says he's "undecided" about kids and Melissa's says "love kids, but not for me".

Thunder stealers.... The only thing I can do to get thunder again is to get married. And we all know that isn't going to happen any time soon.

That's all.

The birds! The birds!!

I like to consider myself fairly easy going. I don't get worked up over much, only the things that are near and dear to me.

But there's one thing that causes me a lot of anxiety.

Birds.

I know, it seems silly, but I promise you that they are out for me. The purposely dive bomb my car in an attempt to run me off the road, give me a stroke, hit me in the face with their beaks, or just generally freak me out.

It all started about 2 and a half months ago. I started noticing that birds were not getting out of the road when I approached, and they seemed to fly out in front of my car a lot.

And then, it happened.

It was a bright sunny morning and Lindsey and I were taking a little drive up to Hamilton in the middle of May, and as usual a bird flew out in front of me. Except this time, the bird stalled in the middle of the road and *SMACK* into my windshield!!! After a slightly major freak out, I began to wonder about the bird I hit. I had this sneaking suspicion that the thing was hanging on to my car, just waiting to attack me. Luckily it was back in the vicinity of where it hit my car, probably just chillin' like a dead bird. hehehe.

Anyway, Erin was lucky enough on Saturday to experience the treachery that is my life. This bird totally came after my car and she witnessed first hand how they have it out for me.

So, this is to tell you that I have a rational fear of birds and they give me mild anxiety. It's nice to meet you to. :)

It’s been a while. Almost 3 months. Oh my, a lot has happened in 3 months. Let me fill you in while I sit and watch a bit of the Harry O’Potter.

I’ve been through a move, graduation, 2 weddings, one big trip, a couple trips home, lots of popsicles, and picking out a retirement plan. *whew* It’s been busy!

Here’s my record and memory of what’s been going on. I’ll tell you all about it (although I think all my readers were there and know it all, but it’s also so I can remember).

So I graduated. I’m done with school. Graduation went really well. It was just a little extra special since all the staff from my office was there. I came into the building and was windblown and frazzled and the ladies all pounced on me and helped me gather myself. Then as we were filing in Brian was counting people into rows on my side and he got to me, hugged me, then shunted me into my row. Backstage I got to see Peggy (who wasn’t bald, thankfully)and then Aleta and Betsy were on stage as I went across. Donna greeted me as I went back to my row and gave me a BIG hug. It was just great! Dan was sitting just behind me. Linds was down the row. Jeff was sitting a few rows back and as Cat walked across the stage he yelled “prettiest girl to graduate!” My family all came. My aunt Jane was a last minute addition as she kind of invited herself, but it went alright. It was great having everyone together again. I think my family enjoyed it too. It helped me successfully seal my spot as ‘golden child’ for a while.

Graduation also meant moving. Lindsey and I have an excellent little apartment that is great for us. Graduation also brought the end of my hiatus from the dating world. Of course, it doesn’t really change much, just that I am even more aware of my singleness and the occasional eligible bachelor I encounter.

A week later we celebrated the nuptials of John and Erin. It was a beautiful wedding and I didn’t even cry! Good times were had by all. During this span of time I managed to sleep in 5 different places in 5 nights. I felt a bit like a hobo. But a clean and cute hobo. Anyway, this was wedding #1 of the season, and it reminded me of how much I dislike being at weddings alone.

I got to add 5 more countries to my “places I’ve been” list. Belgium, the Netherlands, Italy, the Vatican, and Germany. Our cities visited included: Brussels, Rome, Florence, Venice, Verona, Cologne, Amsterdam, and Aachen. I do love to travel. And this was a great experience. We ate lots of gelato, rode the metros, took trains, walked everywhere, almost got run over by numerous Vespas, and saw some pretty spectacular things. I remember thinking several times “I can’t believe I’m at the Coliseum/Sistine Chapel/Leaning Tower of Pisa/Statue of David/etc.” It was great to see Megan and Mike and spend all that time with them. Even though Mike gave me a hard time the entire trip I was finally able to get revenge when he missed a step on the next to last train we were on and bruised his pride. One thing I learned while travelling is that I don’t like being such a consumer. It was hard to spend all that money on myself and for things. I had gotten used to travelling in a missional mindset where you try not to be a consumer at all and really get in with the people and the culture.

We returned to the states well travelled and a bit more cultured, and quite exhausted. Next up was wedding #2 of the summer, Dan and Melissa. It was beautiful and I did cry. I got a sense of what it’s like to go to weddings as an adult. Lindsey and I had a hotel room and that’s what it will continue to be for me as I travel to weddings. Soon I’ll have a room to myself, as everyone else will be married. I did have a brilliant flash of an idea for my wedding. I can’t tell you though, you might steal it and then I’d be really upset. But let me tell you, if I do this at my wedding, it will be undoubtedly the coolest thing to happen at any wedding you’ve been to!

I got to see the Fletcher’s the day after Melissa and Dan’s wedding. I forget how much I miss them until I see them again. Little Ben is growing up and he’s going to be, if he isn’t already, a little heart breaker. Ben wrote me a song, one that I won’t soon forget. Ask me about it and I’ll tell you all about it. It was simply spectacular. I loved it! I keep forgetting that I’ll be going to Camp O in the fall and that I’ll be speaking about Romans. I miss Camp O and its simplicity and beauty. I remember a trip with Katharine and Liz that was ridiculous, one with Marissa that helped reconcile us, another one with Marissa that was more fun. I got to visit Camp O about a year and a half ago (I can’t believe that was that long ago, I guess it makes sense seeing as how different things were then) and I just felt peaceful there. It has a calming effect.

Right, I’m updating. Oh, I forgot to tell you that I have a job!!!! A real, benefits providing J-O-B!! It’s reassuring and scary at the same time. They hired me because they wanted me, and think I can do it. I was pretty confident going into it. Every once in a while I get worried that I’m way too inexperienced and they’ll be disappointed in me. But Tammy keeps talking about how she wants to bump me up and ‘develop my career’ which is good, since I work at the Career Development Center. Anyway, I’m a 22 year old with a real job, benefits, and a retirement plan. This freaks me out and overwhelms me at times. I mean, am I tying myself down to something that will be hard for me to leave if I’m called to? Am I becoming too independent? Am I making it harder to do the things I want? Am I following God’s plan for my life? Am I selling out by getting a job and leading a life here? Am I going to continue to be in my world here, alone, lonely, and miss out on something bigger, or someone? It’s nice to have security, but it comes with its own hindrances.

I love summer for a few reasons. Three of them are stars, fireflies, and fireworks. I love it when those are combined. The Fourth is great for me because now it means a paid day off, AND FIREWORKS!!! Which happen at night when the stars and fireflies are out. *sigh* God loves me.

I think that’s it for now. I’m sure there’s tons I had planned on telling you but I have forgotten. Thanks for listening. I know there will be more as life continues on and seems to leave me behind at times.
Goodnight!